How To Relax

Let's go on an adventure, Charlie.

Since I’m currently underway in my 30-Day Challenge for Relaxation, I think now is the perfect time to record and give away my first Sundream, which is something that I’ve been wanting to do for a long time.

What is a Sundream?

It’s an audio experience, in the form of a story that is meant to relax the listener, inspire creativity, and ignite your imagination.  It breaks the rules of reality to give your mind some time to play and grow.

The origins of a sundream began a few years ago at the University of California Santa Cruz.  Whenever it was sunny out (and that was a lot in Santa Cruz), one of my best friends Annie and I would lie in the grass and tell each other great adventure stories… of giant mountains made of marshmallows… getting a ride from a dinosaur… and so on, and thus the idea of a Sundream was born.

IMPORTANT: Don’t listen to it at while you check your emails, multitask, or sit at your computer.  Take a break and immerse yourself.  Download this 7-minute Sundream for free–take it on your ipod to the park, close your eyes, relax, and really imagine yourself seeing and feeling the story.  Or listen to it in a comfy chair, or right before bedtime to influence sweet dreams

Click here to download: http://soundcloud.com/melissarachelblack/sundream-underwater/download

Please feel free to share it if you like it, and do let me know if you want me to make more.

Berlin 4-Hour-Workweek Recap for 6/3: Forums & Blogging

What would grandma say when you're not sure how to proceed with your business? Just keep trying till something works.

Perhaps the most successful 4HWW meeting yet, we’ve adopted a new format.  Rachman leads the discussions, and asks if anyone has any specific questions or needs help on a particular area in their muse.  I think it’s a great format because its structured like a 1-on-1 conversation which gives individual people real feedback, and the material is useful for the group as well, and everyone is free to jump in to the conversation.  We talked about:

- Hiring SEO experts on Odesk to write affiliate/adsense articles

- Using Feedback Army for real live humans to test the usability of your site and give you feedback, for a small fee.

- Using Appsumo to get daily web coupons (“groupon for web applications”)

- A/B testing with Optimizely is free and highly-recommended by Fabian Dittrich

- You can buy facebook likes for your business or website to increase “credibility”

- Using forums on your blog to increase interaction and productivity, in two ways: 1. Posting on existing forums to bring traffic to your site, or 2. Finding a niche where there isn’t already a forum and bringing it to life by building a forum  on your site.  Increase interaction while at the same time increasing content on your site.  PHPbb is free to build a bulletin board/forum.

- Using Balsamiq for idea prototyping to create digital sketch mockups of a product.

- One of our new visitors, Erik Frank, told us about his site where you can rent great apartments in Berlin for vacation or short stays at berlincribs.com

- Using kickstarter to fund creative projects–a really unique, community-building way of raising money for doing what you love.

- Putting things in terms of dollar signs is a great strategy because it gives customers a good perspective.  For example, a customer who wanted to quit drinking asked Rachman why his site Make Habits cost so much to join, and he told her that she’d save the $39 in a week or two of not drinking, as that’s only 5 or 6 drinks at a bar.

- Sebastian Mikaelson (who is bringing minimalism to Germany at Mr. Minimalist) increased efficiency of his blog by making an elite area and newsletter.

- Using Google Keywords to help think of words to include in your blog’s articles to boost your blog’s appearance in search engines.

- Sebastian also recommends Copyblogger.  He says it provides great content to help new bloggers.

- Mixergy has tons of inspirational videos of successful entrepreneurs.

- Lynda has training/how-to videos on EVERYTHING.  You have to pay, but its a great service according to several folks in the group.

- We all committed to a weekly goal.  Mine was to contact 20 people for my etsy shop.

Looking forward to next week!

30-Day Challenge: Relax

Will small, daily repetitions of relax-edness add up to create a big pool of relaxation?

I’m so amped about my progress and the self-satisfaction boost that completing the previous 30-day challenge has provided me with that i’m going to try another one this month: relaxation.

This one is probably going to be a lot more difficult than the previous, because I won’t be physically producing the desired result in the same way every day.  Rather, its a desired state of being that i’m going to challenge myself to uphold.

I realized that when I am in a state of calm or relaxation, I am able to achieve the results I want in every area of life, or at least accept my own actions without second-guessing.  When I am calm, I am able to make decisions and follow through.  I am in a state of flow and abundance, I feel connected to myself and to the rest of the world, and everything seems to come naturally.

I would say that my natural state (or at least the one i’m used to) is quite frazzled.  She wants to do too many things at once, in the fastest way possible, and she wants to start NOW, but she’s so nervous that she becomes overwhelmed and fearful and takes no action.  This is the opposite of what her highest self wants.

So my challenge to myself is to remain relaxed at all times, and when I feel myself becoming nervous, I must take all the time that is necessary to return to a relaxed state. I recognize now that it is not a waste of time to spend time organizing my mind and calming myself down before starting a task–yes time is being spent, but it is being spent wisely.  Starting the day’s work, going to a meeting, hanging out with friends, or any other activity is great, but if i’m not in the right mindset then I feel uncomfortable and the results are subpar.  I think the right mindset begins with relaxation.  Just as doing work flows more naturally and easily when you’ve got a clear desk, so does life flow more naturally and easily when you’ve got a clear mind.

FEAR OF RELAXATION?

When I was thinking about whether or not I really wanted to do this challenge, the small/weak/nervous part of me (let’s call her Least Self) said “but i’m scared!” and the other part of me, the part that is positive, energetic, and logical (let’s call her Highest Self) couldn’t help but laugh and say, “what, scared to be relaxed all the time?”  That’s just silly–nothing can come of this experiment but positivity, even if I don’t make it every single day (which I nevertheless intend to do.)

NO EXCUSES

My favorite part of this experiment is that I am simply not allowed to worry.  Its against the rules, so any time I catch myself thinking negatively or worrying about the outcome of a decision or “what will happen if…,” I must catch myself and remind Least Self that she is not welcome for the next 30 days.  If I miss her at the end of 30 days, she is welcome to come back, but for the time being, she is banished.

REALITY CHECK

This isn’t to say I expect to be happy and upbeat the entire 30 days (though that would be cool, and if its a result of being relaxed all the time, then bring it on, universe.)  But when I have a low energy day or I’m not feeling in tip-top shape, I have to remember that its not the end of the world.  I have to accept my feelings and remember that it will pass.  Like Steve Pavlina says, I need to observe and appreciate the storm rather than getting caught up in the drama of it. Before this experiment, I have already experienced a few instances of being in a relaxed state during periods of low energy or sadness, and it feels different than giving into the grief and feeling hopeless and angry at myself: rather, it feels good to savour tears sometimes, in the same way that being sore from a workout is satisfying.  So when I have a low day, I just need to relax, enjoy it, and remember that its just part of my natural balance and that it will pass.

IMPLEMENTATION

I don’t mean to avoid stress at all times and to spend the next 30 days lying on the beach, but rather to avoid unnecessary self-imposed stress and worry.  I am not so naive to think this is an easy task, but i think it could provide some really excellent growth.  I know it will be tough, and while I’m full of energy today and feel very gung-ho, I’m pretty sure my focus won’t remain so strong the entire time.  So, when I don’t think I can relax, I have come up with a few techniques to refer to when the going gets tough:

- ask myself what a relaxed person would do in my situation (or the relaxed version of me).

- breathe deeply

- remind myself to remember that stress & worry is not allowed for the next 30 days, and if I allow nervousness to settle in without redirecting my thoughts, I have to start the challenge over from Day 1.

I’ve successfully remained relaxed for the last 3 days, but I actually already had to enforce the last bulletpoint of this list and start over. (Damn, 33 days of relaxation.. how awful.)  I accidentally got stranded in a strange part of the city late last night far away from home and for a brief moment I allowed worry to overwhelm me.  However, after a 2-minute freakout, I remembered to remember to relax, organized my thoughts, found a map, and navigated my way home.  Even though it was a small and brief event and I am proud that I recovered quickly, I’m considering it as a violation of the rules and a reason to restart the challenge because I acted on my thoughts of fear rather than relaxing before acting, even if only for a moment.  I know I will have more worrying instances in the next 30 days, but if I can relax before taking action, then I will consider this challenge a success.

EAGER TO CONTINUE: RELAXATION IS AWESOME

I am really excited to continue this challenge, because in the first 3 days I’ve already noticed some positive effects.  I don’t think that less stressful things are occurring, but rather in a relaxed mindset, I am able to see events in a different light and move past them.  I don’t get stuck in a negative zone of inactivity when I relax: I can accept the situation and carry on my way.  I’m looking forward to the challenge…

Berlin 4-Hour-Workweek Recap for 5/27: Marketing, Networking & Credibility

4-Hour Workweek afterparty. (Ok, not really)

We had even more new people at the meeting than last time! Here’s a quick recap of what we discussed:

- Networking: Rachman reccommends asking people for feedback on your business, and spreading your ideas far and wide. He sets aside 30 minutes every day to email people.

- Using a 110% guarantee on your product. Its more than just risk-free for your customer, and it works.

- How to increase credibility: getting publicity in newspapers, magazines, and blogs – Fabian Dittrich joined us for the first time and he shared his awesome project Fab & Vivien Around the World: they will quit their 9 to 5 jobs and travel the world to increase awareness about social causes and raise money for local projects.

- Chris Williams visited us from the US and shared his experience building his successful business, Heat Spring Learning Institute, which provides education on clean energy training.

- How to make money before your product is ready, and how to prepare for product creation: Teach a class on what you know and charge for it–you will get great feedback from the participants, make money, and gain experience.

- Marketing tips for PPC and in general: Ask a question. For example, if you’re selling a “How to Dance” product, write “Do You Like Dancing?” in your ad

- Using Evernote to streamline & organize notetaking.

So excited to work with you! See you Friday

30-Day Challenge: Learn German

Closeup from my journal... oooh.

Last night I completed my 30-day German Journaling challenge and I’m pretty damn proud of myself.  My german is nowhere near perfect but for the last 30 days, I promised myself that I would write a journal entry every single day in my desired language, and I did it.  I didn’t miss a single day.  If I was cranky as a motherfucker and just wanted to sleep, i wrote in my journal.  If i didn’t have anything interesting to write about, I wrote in my journal.  If I came home drunk and tired at 6 in the morning, I wrote in my journal.  Like i said, I’m nowhere near mastery of the language, but I sure am a lot better than I was 30 days ago.  i’ve learned 248 new words and filled 15 pages with quality, flawless German writing (yeah right… special shoutout and some serious gratitude goes to my roommate Jenni for reading and correcting all of my word-vomit).  I still have a long way to go, but I have written proof that I’ve made at least a little bit of progress.

I was inspired to take on this trial by Steve Pavlina’s 30-day challenges.  The rules are: you have to stick to guidelines you set for yourself, and if you miss even one day, you have to start over from the beginning.  If you don’t like the results after 30 days, you’re totally free to ditch your new habit or state of being.  I think its such a great concept: because its a limited time, and you have an end goal in sight, its a manageable task.  Telling myself “I’m going to learn German” is a vague goal which is allowed to stretch on forever, but putting it in the context of a 30-day journal writing exercise, I had clear actions to take with a light at the end of the tunnel.  Knowing that its only 30 days means there’s no risk–I can try a new habit and see results without guessing about the outcome.  Then I can make an informed decision about whether I would like to continue my habit or go back to my previous state.

I’m so excited about my results though, that I am truly looking forward to continuing the daily habit.  I found that it doesn’t take more than 15-30 minutes per day, but it really makes a big impact on my learning.  Many tiny repetitions, which seem insignificant on their own, accumulate to create something big and meaningful.  Just like one pushup doesn’t give you huge biceps, if you do just a few every day, you’re going to see results.

The 30-day challenge not only improved my German, but also my confidence.  I may have dragged my feet many days, but I reached the finish line.  I am damn proud of myself: I’ve grown my self-discipline muscle a little and proven to myself that if I put in the effort, I get a result.

READY, FIRE, AIM: 4HWW Berlin Meeting Recap

Damn our meeting is sexy.

The weekly 4HWW Berlin group met again this week, and it was the first time since Tim Ferriss showed up at our meeting.  This meant we had several new members, which was super exciting.  Here’s a recap of how it went:

We’re all at different stages of building our businesses, so everyone went around and gave a 30-second summary of where they’re at, what they’re hoping to get out of the meetings, and what they could teach.

We spoke about:
- Email marketing.  Good examples of successful email marketers given by Maneesh were Frank Kern and Eben Pagan.  To make your own email marketing campaigns, Maneesh recommends Mailchimp (free!) and aweber.
- Affiliate marketing.  Rachman suggested signing up for commission junction to get started.
- The use of odesk and elance to hire virtual employees.
- Maneesh praised using the “Ready, Fire, Aim” approach to business instead of “Ready, Aim, Fire”.  That is to say, just try something and fix it later.  Don’t stress out about perfection, just take action and then make adjustments accordingly.  Just another way of using the “Quick and Dirty Technique” mentioned in the previous post. 

I’m inspired by all of you!  And for those of you who have been thinking about coming to the meeting but haven’t done it yet, come next week

The Beauty of Doing It Quick and Dirty

Meeting Tim Ferriss, The Creation & Explosion of our Weekly 4HWW Berlin Meeting, and A Surprise Mentorship from a Car Thief (Juicy Stuff at the End)

Maneesh, Tim, Rachman & Me. Photo stolen from Rachman Blake.

What a fucking month.  Four weeks ago I made a post in my local Berlin couchsurfing group to ask if there was anyone in the city working on their own “muse” (a self-sustaining automated income business designed to earn money with minimal time investment, so that people can spend more time living and less time working, as described in the book “The 4-Hour Workweek” by Tim Ferriss).  I had recently finished reading this book and was basically using it as a Bible to guide me through the steps to make my own business.  I was working alone every day which was boring and lonely, and when I did take the time to meet people, it seemed I was only meeting people who were unhappily but steadily treading down the traditional 9-5 job path.  Every time they asked me what I was doing in Berlin and I replied that I was making my own business, they nodded and smiled and assumed I was “just another starving artist” sitting at home watching Scrubs all day.  This was disheartening.  I’ve read that it’s best to surround yourself with likeminded people, so I gave it a shot with the couchsurfing post… although to be honest, I really didn’t think many people would respond.

On the same day I receive 11 responses, including two from people who had already successfully created their muses and were already successfully living the “digital nomad” lifestyle that I’m working towards!  Even more surprising was the fact that they reached out and offered to help me and the other people who posted that they were interested!  And so began a weekly meeting.

4HWW Party in Berlin, Photo by Axel Jack Metayer

A steady group of about 6 or 7 people headed by Rachman Blake (one of the already-doin-it lifestyle designers) began to gather every week and it has really been an inspiring experience: to know that there are likeminded people in a vicinity, to bounce ideas off one another, to get direct and appropriate feedback and advice.  I look forward to it the entire week, and when I leave, I’m absolutely buzzing with excitment to work on my muse (though the meeting ends on Friday night, which means we’re obliged to party and work must wait… damn life sucks).

I toiled for three weeks brainstorming ideas, re-reading the book, outlining my goals, and creating and adjusting my first muse experiment.  I launched the website last week with a live google adwords campaign and everything, and heaved a big sigh of relief and joy: it was far from perfect, but I had something to show for all my blood sweat & tears (and seriously there were a lot of the last two).

As if it weren’t enough excitement for 3 weeks, I woke up the next morning to find a new post on Tim Ferriss’ blog (read by at least 18 gazillion people) which showed videos made by the entrants of his latest competition.  I was hardly surprised but utterly amped to see that both Rachman Blake and Maneesh Sethi (the two successful 4HWW muse creators who had been helping me) had made it into the semifinals! Equally exciting was the tidbit at the end of the blog post: Tim would be coming to Berlin that very day!  At this moment, I knew I would meet Tim Ferriss.  Imagine a child tasting Nutella for the first time, then riding a pony to the moon, and winning an award for being the world’s best Astronaut.  This was my glee.

And meet him I did. Tim showed up to our weekly meeting last week (woah), and our little group swelled from 6 people to about 40.  He gave a great impromptu Q&A about learning Chinese, being an angel investor, speed reading, and other various random questions that his readers had.  It was awesome.  Rachman & Maneesh (who are also DJs) threw a great party yesterday at L.U.X. in Berlin for Tim, and we got to meet him again.  As exciting as it was to meet the man who wrote the book which has seriously influenced the actions I’m taking in my life, I think the most rewarding part was networking with all these amazing people who are bursting with creative entrepreuneurial energy.  Now we have a facebook group (you should join it) for the growing number of people in Berlin who are interested in building their 4HWW businesses.

The Juicy Ending

Like I said, there were a lot of awesome people at the L.U.X. party, and one of them happened to be the renowned car thief, Axel Jack Metayer.  Ok, ok he’s not a car thief, but that’s what his blog, http://autoschieber.net/ translates to in German.  (Check out his recap of meeting Tim Ferris in Berlin.)  Jack has also been successfully running an automated muse for over 5 years: he owns one of Germany’s leading Auto News websites and offere

Life Lesson: Don't be a pussy. Get it done now, Quick & Dirty.

d to help me with my muse.  We met for lunch the next day and did a lot of brainstorming, website research, learning, sharing.  Lunch turned into dashing to a Capoeira class, Capoeira class turned into a mini party, and a mini party turned into Jack Couchsurfing in our living room.  Today he helped me edit and re-launch my website and adwords campaign.  I learned A LOT, but the most important lesson he had to share was what I will fondly name the Quick & Dirty Technique:  The point is just to get SOMETHING out there.  My muse is nowhere near perfect or  finished in any way, and I could spend the next year of my life getting it ready and still not feel ready or done… but I got the basics down in a gritty way and hit “Publish”.  Now I can test it, and improve it in the next step.  And Jack’s not the only one who suggests this: other “successful” people whom I really admire (like Rachman and Steve Pavlina and a zillion other people throughout history–you got links?) have said the same thing. Their advice to me and my advice to you is just to take that step you’ve been wanting to take: it’s never going to be perfect and you’re never going to be ready, but if you don’t do it now then you risk the chance that you never will.  And you don’t want to grow old wishing you had done that thing you were scared shitless to do, do you?  So get out there and send your script to that director, mail your essay to that magazine, quit that boring job, and ask that hottie out on a date.  Don’t worry about the little stuff, don’t waste time telling yourself you’re not good enough, don’t listen to the fear (everyone has it), ignore the small mistakes for now, and start: hit the literal or proverbial “Publish” button.  Just do it!  You might fail, but if you do, you’ll know how to do it better next time.  And it’s gonna work sooner or later

So, I will follow this advice today twice:

1. I will publish this post after only 1 edit (for spelling errors), and without second-guessing myself.

2. And I will present my baby muse to my friends, family, and the public via my websites (flickr, etsy, twitter, and facebook) and here to you, right now: http://www.artoutlines.com